TheEPICtrainrider's guide to non-noobishness

A work in progress guide to non-noobishness

Saturday, April 3, 2010

The Guide

1. Accept your noobishness, most noobs don't know they're noobs.
2. If you have a question, that's why they have Google, if that fails you, try Bing. Still no results? THEN YOU CAN ASK (few exceptions)
3. Never laugh at your own jokes.
4. This is the internet, think before you post
5. Don't complain about a situation that you can solve. Complaining about a problem you can solve, but are too lazy to is spam. (few exceptions)
6. Most browsers have spell-check, if they don't, they have Google. (take the hint)
7. If you weren't alive before '90, and you run AOL as your browser, You fail. Ask somebody for a firefox download link
8. Assuming your not a noob is noobish
9. If you are racist, sexist, or ageist, you are a ignorant noob.
10. If you don't know who Gordon Freeman or Chuck Norris is, you are a noob
11. If you still don't know who Gord0n Freeman or Chuck Norris is, you should re-read #2.
12. Speaking in 1337 speak when not joking is a sign of noobishnes, same with internet speak.
13. Don't spam smileys
14. No, I will not follow your damn twitter page. GTFO.
15. Let trends die. No need killing them over and over.
16. Never talk about something that nobody around you isn't interested in. You can join another website for that.
17. Noob pride is like Social Awkwardness Pride, so stop being proud of it.
18. Having a billion posts still makes you a noob. Just a noob with too much free time.
20. Respect the classics, even if you don't like them
21. Torrenting is stealing, stealing is for unemployed noobs
22. Saying hello in a chatbox multiple times will not make somebody magically appear. Say it once. That's enough.
23. Try to keep on topic when posting in message boards

Amendment 1: Noobs only [break the rules of the guide] thinking they're funny, cute, or just like pissing people off. So breaking these rules in attempting to be a noob does not count as noobishness.

Amendment 2: If a noob continues his/her/it's noobish ways to a point where they are breaking the rules of the website/gameserver, he/she/it has no right to resist a short-long banning.

Amendment 3: For rule #6, general typos can't classify you as a noob. Words that are easy to spell, such as 'scene' or 'since', being misspelled will be a violation of Rule #6. Forgetting one or two characters is considered a typo.

Amendment 4: In regards to #23, moving away from the topic of discussion is not considered noobishness as long as said 'off-topicness' is in some shape, way or form related to the real topic of disscussion. (Ex. When talking about trains, you move onto the topic of pollution)

Any Suggestions?

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